Mindfulness

The biggest life lessons are actually quiet, gradual, and you will be sitting randomly drinking a cup of Earl Grey as it slowly creeps to the conscious part of your mind. Or at least that's how it happened to me. One of the most common questions on journaling topic lists are: What is a lesson you wish you could go back in time and tell your sixteen year old self?  What is the biggest lesson you have learned in life?  So as cliched as it seems, I decided to take this topic on, because I believe this is a lesson that would work in any phase of life.  Phases of Life:  Curious Kid:  Life is a journey and when you start you are open to everything. You are a kid. Everything around you is exciting and unknown. So you seize the day and do crazy dangerous things like put a key in a socket, because you were pretending to drive the DeLorean. You are excited about school and you can imagine yourself doing anything. Life is mystery and it's fun.  Disson...

I am fascinated with language. Always have been. Might have been my socratic training approach to philosophy, which teaches that in order to discuss a concept in depth you need to check your own knowledge of what IT is. Take the example of when Socrates was accused of impious acts and behaviors. He started by asking a simple question: what does impious mean? This led him to realize he was asking the wrong question at the wrong time and where he should start is to define piety. This might seem like an exhausted pointless exercise, but really it tests how well you understand what you know and what others know. Also language is a tricky thing where meanings evolve and societal misuse or misunderstanding can be  prevalent for big concepts like truth or justice. I have done this with the word 'happiness' and now I want to examine the word 'hope.' Definitions:  So what is hope? According to Merriam dictionary it means, "a feeling of expectation and desire for a ce...

Another year has passed and therefore another reflection is to be made and another chapter of my life needs to be titled. These are the chapters of my life so far as a re-cap before I get into my reflections of this year.  1987-2001  CHILDHOOD 2001-2005  ADOLESCENCE  2005 the year of  DOUBT 2006 the year of  LOSS 2007 the year of the  HOPE 2008 the year of  ABANDON  2009 the year of  UNKNOWN 2010 the year of  RISK 2011 the year of  LEARNING  2012 the year of  PAYING DUES  2013 the year of  ISOLATION  2014 the year of  DEVELOPMENT 2015 the year of  HOME 2016 the year of  EXPANSION 2017 the year of  FOLLOW THROUGH   I have honestly never had a year like this year. I think this is why I am having a hard time naming 2018 any name, because I feel like no matter what direction I go the word misses something important. Normally, I tell you the chapter title an...

I was listening to a podcast about transformations this morning as I walked to the gym. People were telling their stories about how they went from one thing to something completely different. One was a boy who grew up in a fundamental Islamic household, his father a convicted terrorist, and then became an anti-extremist activist. Another a gang member who served time for murder who is now doing outreach and motivational speaking. Then a couple of the examples were more physical in nature in terms of gender and the inability to walk. All of these stories were amazing and even though the host never highlighted the similarities between these stories it was quite apparent. New Year's is upon us and this is normally the time when all of us make wishes about the transformations we want to make in the upcoming year. Most likely the reason why this podcast chose the theme of transformations, because it is on all of our minds. Of course, most of us make goals for the new year and many o...

If there is one thing that I am certain of it would be that I still have a lot to learn. The second thing I am beginning to become certain of is that life is a process. A series of decisions, reflections, adjustments, and setting goals that, in theory, are to be repeated as we take our own individual journeys. It is easy to feel as if everyone else has things figured out while you struggle, but the truth is we all struggle, even the motivational gurus and celebrities that sell you ideas of happiness. The thing about this process though is that you need to be honest with yourself about your shortcomings, your obstacles, your baggage, and your own toxic behaviors. Those conversations are hard. Why? We live in a world where failure is seen as a weakness and our brains tend to have a negativity bias holding on to pain longer than we should as well as repeating hurtful words that have been said to us on loop. As a teacher and as a resource kid I live in the world of what failure can d...

This is not going to a long blog post, because my major musings are more global in scale and I have yet to even contain those thoughts even 1%. I will though leave you with this thought. Life is crazy, hectic, and one hell of a ride sometimes. But even when you are ragged and exhausted if you are not having fun then something is not quite right. Right now I am thinking about the future of my discipline, unsure of where it is going, trusting the process, and knowing there are many learning curves. I have signed up for new responsibilities with a research group, maintaining certain work I have always done, and maybe even contemplating coaching soccer. My plate is not emptier or lighter, but my plate is definitely filled with more nutrient rich food.  Taking on projects I am passionate about, care about, and make my Ravenclaw mind run with abandon to solve a problem that has yet to be solved. I got rid of the things that I was doing out of being a 'team player' that really was...

I once got in trouble with a friend, because I told this person that self-love needs to come before other kinds of love. I do not regret my statements and I will say it everyday of the week. Here is my reasoning. The biggest deterrence of contentment is when we put too much on other people. When you expect someone to make you happy or when you say to yourself 'if I had this I would be happy,' because the truth is contentment comes from what you do and how you treat yourself. Friends and love ones are meant to help support not the ones who are suppose to take on all the pressure. I like to think of this as the structure principal. You create a wonderful structure and you can remove certain stones which might make you weak, but you are still standing, and it is self-love that is the keystone. Once the keystone is moved the whole structure falls even if the other stones are strong and sturdy, because it is that stone that takes on the most pressure. My friends are not responsibl...