Mindfulness

I was listening to a podcast about transformations this morning as I walked to the gym. People were telling their stories about how they went from one thing to something completely different. One was a boy who grew up in a fundamental Islamic household, his father a convicted terrorist, and then became an anti-extremist activist. Another a gang member who served time for murder who is now doing outreach and motivational speaking. Then a couple of the examples were more physical in nature in terms of gender and the inability to walk. All of these stories were amazing and even though the host never highlighted the similarities between these stories it was quite apparent. New Year's is upon us and this is normally the time when all of us make wishes about the transformations we want to make in the upcoming year. Most likely the reason why this podcast chose the theme of transformations, because it is on all of our minds. Of course, most of us make goals for the new year and many o...

If there is one thing that I am certain of it would be that I still have a lot to learn. The second thing I am beginning to become certain of is that life is a process. A series of decisions, reflections, adjustments, and setting goals that, in theory, are to be repeated as we take our own individual journeys. It is easy to feel as if everyone else has things figured out while you struggle, but the truth is we all struggle, even the motivational gurus and celebrities that sell you ideas of happiness. The thing about this process though is that you need to be honest with yourself about your shortcomings, your obstacles, your baggage, and your own toxic behaviors. Those conversations are hard. Why? We live in a world where failure is seen as a weakness and our brains tend to have a negativity bias holding on to pain longer than we should as well as repeating hurtful words that have been said to us on loop. As a teacher and as a resource kid I live in the world of what failure can d...

This is not going to a long blog post, because my major musings are more global in scale and I have yet to even contain those thoughts even 1%. I will though leave you with this thought. Life is crazy, hectic, and one hell of a ride sometimes. But even when you are ragged and exhausted if you are not having fun then something is not quite right. Right now I am thinking about the future of my discipline, unsure of where it is going, trusting the process, and knowing there are many learning curves. I have signed up for new responsibilities with a research group, maintaining certain work I have always done, and maybe even contemplating coaching soccer. My plate is not emptier or lighter, but my plate is definitely filled with more nutrient rich food.  Taking on projects I am passionate about, care about, and make my Ravenclaw mind run with abandon to solve a problem that has yet to be solved. I got rid of the things that I was doing out of being a 'team player' that really was...

I once got in trouble with a friend, because I told this person that self-love needs to come before other kinds of love. I do not regret my statements and I will say it everyday of the week. Here is my reasoning. The biggest deterrence of contentment is when we put too much on other people. When you expect someone to make you happy or when you say to yourself 'if I had this I would be happy,' because the truth is contentment comes from what you do and how you treat yourself. Friends and love ones are meant to help support not the ones who are suppose to take on all the pressure. I like to think of this as the structure principal. You create a wonderful structure and you can remove certain stones which might make you weak, but you are still standing, and it is self-love that is the keystone. Once the keystone is moved the whole structure falls even if the other stones are strong and sturdy, because it is that stone that takes on the most pressure. My friends are not responsibl...

Many people ask me a lot of questions about how I lost weight, how do I keep it off, and how I fit in all the things I do in a short amount of time. First of all, I definitely do not have life all figured out. Still a struggle and there are some days that are harder than others. I never want to project that image of perfection, because it does not exist. So I have no answers for that, because no matter what striving for your goals is going to take work. There is no short cut. It just does. I can answer this question though: Why am I doing better than I did before? I was always someone who was athletic and active. I schooled my PE teacher at field hockey. I competed with the neighborhood boys on the soccer field, baseball, roller hockey, and soccer. But I was also the worst time manager in the entire world, due to laziness and also just a scattered mind. A million things would run through my mind and I would start a million things, but not finish anything since I always got another ...

I became a teacher for many reasons, but the main driving reason for why I became a teacher was because I was a miserable student. School was not my safe spot. I preferred my friends in my neighborhood and talking with my older cousins. I struggled with math and I struggled to pay attention in class. I would rather run with my daydreams which for a long time was thought to be a hearing problem, so I was given a million hearing tests. I joked with my mother that all I remember from Elementary School was hearing tests and multiplication cards. I despised the way I felt and I often adapted in maybe not so healthy ways. I wanted to be an educator to maybe change some things and have an opportunity to work with those goofball kids who have all the potential in the world, but seem to limit themselves. These experiences have made me a fighter, but for longer than I care to admit it put a chip on my shoulder. I was constantly on the defense. So the last couple of weeks I have been thinking a...

Months ago or maybe a month ago, time is blurring all together, I asked what the difference was between happiness and fulfillment. Many of the answers matched my thinking. So before I get to my thoughts on the matter let us start with differentiating between the two concepts. The difference between fulfillment and happiness is simply one of depth and time. The best way to explain this difference is with food. Happiness is like eating your guilty pleasure food like candy or a greasy burger from your favorite fast food joint. While you eat you feel euphoric and satisfied, but it is not the type of nutrition that your body can use efficiently. Fulfillment is like a well-balanced meal that makes your body feel powerful and can help you run more efficiently, because your body is getting all the elements it needs. Happiness are moments. I felt happy when I was with my friends in a pub talking with foreign strangers. I felt happy when I got my first permanent teaching job. Happiness did n...